On this 25th day of November, 2010, the citizens of The United States of America are celebrating Thanksgiving.  We’re gathering with loved ones to remininise about holidays past and create new memories over food, football, and fun!

The main purpose of this special day is to give thanks for our many blessings.  A few things that top my list are those who had the courage to venture out and discover this fine land and those that serve to protect it, my family and friends, my health and home, and the opportunity to start anew, which I did last year by creating Gratitude Boot Camp.

In honor of this celebration, I’d like to share 25 of my favorite quotes about thankfulness and gratitude (with a few created by me)…

1.  “When you become truly aware of your current blessings and are filled with genuine gratitude, your life will change in profound ways” ~ Sandy Harper

2. ”If the only prayer you said in your whole life was, “thank you,” that would suffice.”  ~ Meister Eckhart

3.  “The only people with whom you should try to get even are those who have helped you.” ~ John E. Southard

4. ‎”If you want to feel rich, just count the things you have that money can’t buy.” ~ Unknown.

5.  “He is a wise man who does not grieve for the things which he has not, but rejoices for those which he has.” ~ Epictetus

6.  “If you want to turn your life around, try thankfulness.  It will change your life mightily.” ~ Gerald Good

7.  “When eating bamboo sprouts, remember the man who planted them.” ~  Chinese Proverb

8.  “When you are grateful fear disappears and abundance appears.” ~ Tony Robbins

9.  “Wake at dawn with a winged heart and give thanks for another day of loving.”  ~ Kahlil Gibran

10. “Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today, and creates a vision for tomorrow.” ~ Unknown

11. “It’s important to make gratitude a habit because your habits create your life.” ~ Sandy Harper

12. “Develop an attitude of gratitude, and give thanks for everything that happens to you, knowing that every step forward is a step toward achieving something bigger and better than your current situation.” ~ Brian Tracy

13. ”Gratitude helps you to grow and expand; gratitude brings joy and laughter into your life and into the lives of all those around you.” ~ Eileen Caddy

14. “We can only be said to be alive in those moments when our hearts are conscious of our treasures. ” ~ Thornton Wilder

15. “Nothing is more honorable than a grateful heart.” ~ Seneca

16. “Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life.  It turns what we have into enough, and more.  It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity.  It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend.  Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.” ~ Melody Beattie

17. “Of all the attitudes we can acquire, surely the attitude of gratitude is the most important and by far the most life-changing.” ~ Zig Ziglar

18. “You simply will not be the same person two months from now after consciously giving thanks each day for the abundance that exists in your life. And you will have set in motion an ancient spiritual law: the more you have and are grateful for, the more will be given you.”  ~ Sarah Ban Breathnach

19. “Whatever our individual troubles and challenges may be, it’s important to pause every now and then to appreciate all that we have, on every level. We need to literally “count our blessings,” give thanks for them, allow ourselves to enjoy them, and relish the experience of prosperity we already have.”  ~ Shakti Gawain

20. “If you concentrate on finding whatever is good in every situation, you will discover that your life will suddenly be filled with gratitude, a feeling that nurtures the soul.” ~ Rabbi Harold Kushner

21. “Gratitude is a powerful force that opens the door to God’s blessing. Having constant gratitude proves your faith in God because not only do you thank Him for what He has done in the past, you thank Him for what He will do in the future.” ~ Joel Osteen

22. “Gratitude should not be just a reaction to getting what you want, but an all-the-time gratitude, the kind where you notice the little things and where you constantly look for the good, even in unpleasant situations. Start bringing gratitude to your experiences, instead of waiting for a positive experience in order to feel grateful.” ~ Marelisa Fábrega

23. “No one who achieves success does so without the help of others. The wise and confident acknowledge this help with gratitude.” ~ Alfred North Whitehead

24. “Gratitude is something of which none of us can give too much.  For on the smiles, the thanks we give, out little gestures of appreciation, our neighbors build their philosophy of life.” ~ A. J. Cronin

25.  “Gratitude possesses magical power.  When you live in gratitude, you will walk in peace… no matter what circumstances arise.” ~ Sandy Harper

I’m grateful that you took the time to visit my blog.  What are you thankful for today?

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When was the last time you said thank you to… YOU?

I placed a deadline on myself where I would finish my book and write the stories for my children’s book over a 4-day period, while my son was visiting his Papi for the long weekend.  I drove Jake over on Thursday night and went to bed early so I would wake up Friday morning full of energy and ready to write.  The next morning, I awoke to a bad case of… writer’s block!!  It lasted all day.

When night-fall came, it hit me – I had been worrying all day about my self-imposed deadline and had focused on everything I still needed to get accomplished!  My books were unfinished, my Gratitude Boot Camp audio/workbook program still had to be produced, there were cards to be written and phone calls to be made, my professional business plan was not complete, etc etc etc.

“Oh my word, Sandy”, I said to myself.  “How about thinking about all of the things you have accomplished for a change?  What about the many tasks you complete every day as a business owner,  friend, writer, homeowner, single Mom, etc.?”

I immediately sat at my desk and wrote down everything I had achieved since starting Gratitude Boot Camp fifteen months ago.  After the concept came to me in the middle of the night, I created the complete curriculum to teach The 12 Gratitude Habits after researching the power of gratitude extensively.  I’ve given workshops, recorded hours of the system for the audio program, spoken to groups, built a gratitude community on Facebook and Twitter, wrote several chapters of a book that made it to the Top 25 in The Next Top Author Competition, and started a children’s book about gratitude.  I did all of this while working on my other businesses and raising a toddler/pre-schooler.  I do deserve a pat on the back, I realized!

When was the last time you made a list of your accomplishments and achievements?  Immediately after reading this article, grab a piece of paper.  At the top write the words “I thank myself for”.  Then, list everything you do on a daily basis and all of the goals you have reached this year, both big and small.

After you’ve finished this exercise, celebrate YOU!  Treat yourself to a bubble bath, go for a long walk, take yourself out for coffee or to the movies, read a book, or spend some time engaged in your favorite hobby!

Keep this list handy so you can read it the next time you’re starting to beat yourself up about everything you HAVE to do!  Hmmmm – maybe I should laminate mine!!

Well… it’s been exactly one month since my last blog posting.  So much for my goal of writing something on here at least once per week!

My first reaction when I realized it had been so long was to feel guilty.  Just like my first thought when I woke up after sleeping in last Saturday was “How dare I stay in bed until 9:00 whenever I have SO much to do?”

Why do we allow guilt to consume us?  I chatted with a friend who didn’t fully enjoy her (much-deserved) vacation recently because she felt guilty about leaving work and her child.

I’m always saying that life is too short and too precious to feel sorry for ourselves or to hold grudges or to not give gratitude for our blessings.  Yet, I somehow have kept guilt around as a regular house guest.

That stops NOW!  Today – September 17, 2010… I am declaring my home (and my brain) as a “Guilt Free Zone!”  Won’t you join me?  The next time that a guilty thought starts to form in your head or come out of your mouth, stop it with a power word!  A power word is one that you use to stop immediately so you can refocus your thoughts and/or words.  As soon as the guilt starts, shout “Love” (even if it’s only in your head) and then say – “I feel great.  I am grateful for this very moment and embrace it fully.”

(Photo by Michal Marcol – http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=371)

I was out of town Tuesday night when I received the text from my room-mate/manny, just before midnight.  He was contacting me with the news that my air conditioner had died…completely.  We live in Central Florida, where we have been experiencing temperatures in the 90′s, and even in the low 100′s some days!

My immediate reaction was an expletive spoken under my breath (which I quickly asked forgiveness for).  But, then I started “practicing what I preach” in my Gratitude Boot Camp sessions.  I took some deep, cleansing breaths and started counting all of my blessings.  Then, I said my prayers and drifted off to sleep soundly (instead of tossing and turning and worrying, as I would have done in days past).

The next day, I did not allow myself to get upset at all about the broken air conditioner, even though it was happening at an inopportune time.  Instead, I focused on my blessings; remembered that I grew up in a house with no air in Florida and survived; and took action to find ways to live with the situation for a while, by getting my hands on some oscillating fans to use temporarily.  I went about my day in a calm way, knowing that “this too shall pass”.

As I was driving home last night, I kept my thoughts on all of the good things going on in my life, not allowing any negative statements to enter my brain, not even for a minute!  When we arrived home, I explained to my almost-four year old son, Jake, that he was only gonna sleep in a light shirt, instead of his jammies and socks, for a while.  I started walking towards the stairs to put him to bed.  I felt completely at ease with our situation and was ready to let the hot night take me back to happy, childhood memories.

As I was passing by the closet that holds the breaker box for my house, I stopped to check it even though David had already done so.  The breaker for the air conditioner appeared to be lined up with all of the rest, but I flipped it off and back on any way.  It was music to my ears when I heard the air conditioner kick on and Jake squealed with delight when his Mommy started doing a very up-beat happy dance!  We danced around and sang our new “Mommy and Jake are Grateful for Air Conditioning” song for quite a while before we went up to his bedroom.  It was fun!!!

I woke up feeling extra grateful and happy today.  David is perplexed.  Jake is well-rested.  And, I am feeling the powerful sense of accomplishment that comes with remaining calm during a crises.

Resolve, right now, that you will remain calm the next time an unexpected challenge arises in your life.  It is powerful.

I hosted a baby shower at my house last week for a small group of women who, like me, have 3 year old children.  We recounted stories of things that our children recently said or did.

One Mom talked about how her daughter called a friend a “dumb ass”; another lamented because her child wouldn’t bow or curtsy during a school play because he didn’t want her to think he was acting silly; another described how her daughter was pretending to be ‘the Mommy’ and slapped her hand on her forehead in exasperation; another spoke about how her daughter pointed to a man wearing an earring and proclaimed loudly “boys aren’t supposed to wear earrings…only girls”; and I shared that, when my friend watched Jake the other day, he said “Have you seen Sandy Harper’s Gratitude Boot Camp on Facebook?”

We all laughed because kids say the darndest things!  We also pointed out all of the wonderful things that we do as Mothers and didn’t allow each other to feel badly about anything our children say or do that might cause us to feel guilt…after all, there is no such thing as a perfect Mother.  

Later, I thought about how our children are such mirrors of us!  I thought about what my child said and realized that I’ve been working too much lately!  So…I am committing right now to spend a minimum of one hour of uninterrupted time with him per work day (even if it is in 5 – 15 minute increments)…no phone and no computer allowed!  We are going to sit down right now and play a board game…as. soon. as. I. finish. posting. on. Facebook, that is!!!

(Image: Francesco Marino / FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

Begin and end your day with these affirmations. 

Take some deep breaths and get into a relaxed state. As you read each one, feel the emotion it invokes.

Do this daily, for your words create your reality.

♥ I am filled with Gratitude for all of my blessings today!

♥ I have great self-management skills!

♥ I am surrounded by positive people who add value to my life!

♥ I am massively organized!

♥ I have a joyful spirit!

♥ I am financially free and am Grateful for my riches!

♥ Today, I will concentrate on taking one step forward, however small!

♥ I do whatever it takes!

♥ I act in spite of my fears!

♥ My loved ones are happy, healthy, and prospering!

♥ I schedule my priorities every day!

♥ I am laser-focused on my priorities!

♥ I am a self-reliant and successful person!

♥ I forgive quickly and move on!

♥ I resolve issues quickly and with a calmness of spirit!

♥ I live a healthy lifestyle!

♥ I learn from every experience!

♥ I eliminate all negativity out of my life!

♥ My thoughts are creative and I am now creating the reality that I desire!

♥ I will take at least 1 action today in the direction of my long term plans!

♥ I am always receiving money making ideas and acting upon them!

♥ I only attract loving people in my world for they are a mirror of what I am!

♥ Today, I choose to find the good in myself and others!

♥ I see past old limitations and envision new opportunities!

♥ I love myself. And I love how I feel when I love myself!

♥ I am an extreme action taker!

♥ I am more enthusiastic today and am improving this trait daily!

♥ I am prosperous and abundant. I gain income from unexpected sources!

♥ Divine love is working through me now!

♥ I add value to other people’s lives!

♥ I let go of any burdens that are not mine to carry!

♥ I give generously and from my heart!

♥ I am decisive and follow through!

♥ I am positive and optimistic!

♥ I commit to being rich in every way!

♥ I always awaken completely refreshed!

♥ Today, I am energetic and enthusiastic!

♥ I live with purpose and passion!

♥ I have compassion for all living things!

♥ I release judgment and criticism of myself and others!

♥ Every breath I take brings me greater health and vitality!

♥ I love my life!

♥ Money is flowing into my life, quickly and easily!

♥ Every day and in every way, I’m getting better and better!

♥ I am grateful for today and for all of my blessings!

When I posted my 50 life lessons in January, number four on the list was…

Make decisions wisely and from a place of love and goodness, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest.

Oftentimes in life, we either make hasty decisions (which is never wise) or we make decisions based totally on our own selfish desires.  I have certainly been guilty of not stopping to think things through sometimes and, in those moments, the choices that I made inevitably did not turn out the best for everyone involved.

Thankfully, I have made some major decisions in my life based on what was in everyone’s best interest.  And, in those instances, the results were positive.

• When my Mom died, I was 16 years old.  I sat at her grave-site and said to myself, “Sandy…this can either make you better or it can make you bitter.  It’s your choice.”  I chose to be better because of it…to be empathetic towards others who experience loss; to appreciate my health; and to strive to be like her ~ kind, strong, accepting, nonjudgmental.  That was the best choice for everyone because I still had a younger brother and Daddy to take care of at home and it would not have served them well for me to be bitter.

•  When my Daddy died unexpectedly on Christmas Eve, three years after my Mom, I had another choice to make.  I could be sad every year at Christmas time or I could celebrate it fully to make fond memories for others, that will last long after I am gone.  I was a teenager.  Did I really want Christmas to be a sad occasion for the rest of my life?  Absolutely not!  I chose to make it a joyous occasion and started collecting Christmas decorations and ornaments, obtaining something new every year since.  It takes me days to decorate my home for Christmas now and I love sharing it with others and hosting parties and celebrating Life!

•  Shortly after my Daddy died, I got married and, after a custody battle, his 5 year old daughter, Stephanie, came to live with us full-time.  Her Mother, Carolyn, moved away and was heartbroken.  Stephanie looked at me with her big, blue eyes and said “Do I call you Mommy now?”  I had a choice to make.  I could have told her to absolutely call me Mommy because I was her Mother now and could have spoken badly about her Mom.  Instead, I said “You have a Mommy that loves you very much.  You can call me Sandy.”  And…I chose to include Carolyn in every major decision and we stayed in close contact.  Now…30 years later, Carolyn and I are very close friends who (along with her Dad) raised a daughter together who is sweet, thoughtful, and kind.  Stephanie had the joy of always having three families that loved her and, even though her Dad and I divorced when she was 12, we are all a close, extended family to this day.

•  Even though I am not in a relationship with my 3 year old son’s father any more, we have chosen to be good friends and co-parents.  We truly care about each other and it is definitely in Jake’s best interest to see us respect each other and to be happy when we are around one another.

The next time that you have a major event in your life, won’t you take a moment to really think it through, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest?  Take it from me…it will make your life peaceful and happy & you will be setting a good example for those that look to you for guidance.

When my three year old son, Jake, and I go for a walk or to the grocery store or anywhere for that matter, he acts as if he is running for Mayor.  He greets everyone with a cheerful “Hi” and  if he is not able to find out your name, he will make one up for you (and he always comes up with very interesting monikers for people)!

There was a time whenever my friends were worried that there was something wrong with him because he did not seem to connect.  He did not say the word “Mommy” until much, much later than his playmates.  In fact, he was the last one in our playgroup to roll over, sit up, crawl, walk, and talk although he is one of the eldest of the bunch.

I recently took him for his 3 year old check-up although he is 3.5 now.  I know, I know…I’m always late too (hey…wait a minute, maybe he comes by it justly?  And…before you judge my mothering skills, you must know that there were no major shots or anything involved in this doctor visit).  His Pediatrician was amazed at his level of communication (even though she had been somewhat skeptical that there was anything wrong when I showed up at her office in tears, one year earlier).  “Did you put him in therapy?” she asked.  “No” I replied “About a week after my panicked visit, he started talking up a storm, in complete sentences and full of emotion & empathy, and he has not stopped since!”  She and I hugged!

I looked at her, contemplatively, and said, “You know…there is a life lesson here.  We are sometimes so quick to judge and we, so often, live our lives in a state of comparison.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we simply accepted each other, encouraged each other to reach our potential, and did not judge each other’s process of growth, whether we be children or adults?”  She smiled and said “Why yes, it would”.  After she walked out with her stethoscope in hand, I gave my child an extra hug and gave myself a break for the fact that I was at a place that some may view as “being behind”.  And, as I walked out of the doctor’s office, I thought “Watch out world…I might just run for Mayor!”

*I am adding to this post to clarify a couple of things about my child.  He reached all of his major milestones within the “normal” time frames, it was just always at the very end.  He loves to play with other children and connects with people very well.  Like all 3 year olds, he asks millions of questions each day (his favorite is asking what every single sign says as we drive up and down Interstate 4; which we do a lot, so Mommy is learning the art of extreme patience) and we carry on conversations with each other.  He is smart and sweet with a great sense of humor and some of the same “quirks” that I had as a child.  I really believe that, while you should make sure that your child is developing his/her major milestones according to “the charts”, you also have to be careful about comparing him/her to other children.  And, I believe that you need to accept them for who they are and praise & encourage them to excel without placing judgment upon them.*

Since I made the decision to start paying more attention to my blog, I perused the subjects that I had created when I set it up and came across “The Singlehood Journey” as a  choice.  It did not have any entries in it and I decided to quickly delete it as an option for me to write about!  Sure…I have lots of funny stories about being single (mostly from my pre-baby days of almost 4 years ago since I don’t go out much now) and I can certainly give a real view on that status (since I’ve spent more of my adult years “single” than I have “in a relationship”), but…I started thinking about how I am coaching people on how they need to “put out into The Universe” what they want to come back to them and decided that labeling myself as “single” and then writing about it consistently is not such a good idea after all!

I am certainly not “pining away” for a man nor do I ever feel lonely or sad (because I really do enjoy my own company).  However, when I think of the “big picture” of my life, I would like to finally meet and connect with the perfect man for me (and for my son).  I even sat down and wrote out my “man list” on a legal pad recently, which is something that I have never done.  It was actually kinda fun…well, it will be when I meet that guy!!!

So…the point of this blog post is…

Make sure that everything that you do and say is in alignment with the life that you wish to create for yourself while expressing Gratitude for what you currently have (I am actually very grateful that I am able to spend my time alone as I please right now) and watch your life transform according to your wishes.

Just think of the great love story that is going to appear in my life when the time is right!  It sure is gonna be fun!!