Entries tagged with “Thoughts”.


I was out of town Tuesday night when I received the text from my room-mate/manny, just before midnight.  He was contacting me with the news that my air conditioner had died…completely.  We live in Central Florida, where we have been experiencing temperatures in the 90’s, and even in the low 100’s some days!

My immediate reaction was an expletive spoken under my breath (which I quickly asked forgiveness for).  But, then I started “practicing what I preach” in my Gratitude Boot Camp sessions.  I took some deep, cleansing breaths and started counting all of my blessings.  Then, I said my prayers and drifted off to sleep soundly (instead of tossing and turning and worrying, as I would have done in days past).

The next day, I did not allow myself to get upset at all about the broken air conditioner, even though it was happening at an inopportune time.  Instead, I focused on my blessings; remembered that I grew up in a house with no air in Florida and survived; and took action to find ways to live with the situation for a while, by getting my hands on some oscillating fans to use temporarily.  I went about my day in a calm way, knowing that “this too shall pass”.

As I was driving home last night, I kept my thoughts on all of the good things going on in my life, not allowing any negative statements to enter my brain, not even for a minute!  When we arrived home, I explained to my almost-four year old son, Jake, that he was only gonna sleep in a light shirt, instead of his jammies and socks, for a while.  I started walking towards the stairs to put him to bed.  I felt completely at ease with our situation and was ready to let the hot night take me back to happy, childhood memories.  

As I was passing by the closet that holds the breaker box for my house, I stopped to check it even though David had already done so.  The breaker for the air conditioner appeared to be lined up with all of the rest, but I flipped it off and back on any way.  It was music to my ears when I heard the air conditioner kick on and Jake squealed with delight when his Mommy started doing a very up-beat happy dance!  We danced around and sang our new “Mommy and Jake are Grateful for Air Conditioning” song for quite a while before we went up to his bedroom.  It was fun!!!

I woke up feeling extra grateful and happy today.  David is perplexed.  Jake is well-rested.  And, I am feeling the powerful sense of accomplishment that comes with remaining calm during a crises.  

Resolve, right now, that you will remain calm the next time an unexpected challenge arises in your life.  It is powerful.

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I hosted a baby shower at my house last week for a small group of women who, like me, have 3 year old children.  We recounted stories of things that our children recently said or did.

One Mom talked about how her daughter called a friend a “dumb ass”; another lamented because her child wouldn’t bow or curtsy during a school play because he didn’t want her to think he was acting silly; another described how her daughter was pretending to be ‘the Mommy’ and slapped her hand on her forehead in exasperation; another spoke about how her daughter pointed to a man wearing an earring and proclaimed loudly “boys aren’t supposed to wear earrings…only girls”; and I shared that, when my friend watched Jake the other day, he said “Have you seen Sandy Harper’s Gratitude Boot Camp on Facebook?”

We all laughed because kids say the darndest things!  We also pointed out all of the wonderful things that we do as Mothers and didn’t allow each other to feel badly about anything our children say or do that might cause us to feel guilt…after all, there is no such thing as a perfect Mother.  

Later, I thought about how our children are such mirrors of us!  I thought about what my child said and realized that I’ve been working too much lately!  So…I am committing right now to spend a minimum of one hour of uninterrupted time with him per work day (even if it is in 5 – 15 minute increments)…no phone and no computer allowed!  We are going to sit down right now and play a board game…as. soon. as. I. finish. posting. on. Facebook, that is!!!

(Image: Francesco Marino / FreeDigitalPhotos.net)

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Begin and end your day with these affirmations. 

Take some deep breaths and get into a relaxed state and, as you read each one, feel the emotion that it invokes.

Do this daily…your words create your reality…

♥ I am filled with Gratitude for all of my blessings today!

♥ I have great self-management skills!

♥ I am surrounded by positive people who add value to my life!

♥ I am massively organized!

♥ I have a joyful spirit!

♥ I am financially free and am Grateful for my riches!

♥ Today, I will concentrate on taking one step forward, however small!

♥ I do whatever it takes!

♥ I act in spite of my fears!

♥ My loved ones are happy, healthy, and prospering!

♥ I schedule my priorities every day!

♥ I am laser-focused on my priorities!

♥ I am a self-reliant and successful person!

♥ I forgive quickly and move on!

♥ I resolve issues quickly and with a calmness of spirit!

♥ I live a healthy lifestyle!

♥ I learn from every experience!

♥ I eliminate all negativity out of my life!

♥ My thoughts are creative and I am now creating the reality that I desire!

♥ I will take at least 1 action today in the direction of my long term plans!

♥ I am always receiving money making ideas and acting upon them!

♥ I only attract loving people in my world for they are a mirror of what I am!

♥ Today, I choose to find the good in myself and others!

♥ I see past old limitations and envision new opportunities!

♥ I love myself. And I love how I feel when I love myself!

♥ I am an extreme action taker!

♥ I am more enthusiastic today and am improving this trait daily!

♥ I am prosperous and abundant. I gain income from unexpected sources!

♥ Divine love is working through me now!

♥ I add value to other people’s lives!

♥ I let go of any burdens that are not mine to carry!

♥ I give generously and from my heart!

♥ I am decisive and follow through!

♥ I am positive and optimistic!

♥ I commit to being rich in every way!

♥ I now have more money that I need!

♥ I always awaken completely refreshed!

♥ Today, I am energetic and enthusiastic!

♥ I live with purpose and passion!

♥ I have compassion for all living things!

♥ I release judgment and criticism of myself and others!

♥ Every breath I take brings me greater health and vitality!

♥ I love my life!

♥ Money is flowing into my life, quickly and easily!

♥ I am grateful for today and for all of my blessings!

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When I posted my 50 life lessons in January, number four on the list was…

Make decisions wisely and from a place of love and goodness, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest.

Oftentimes in life, we either make hasty decisions (which is never wise) or we make decisions based totally on our own selfish desires.  I have certainly been guilty of not stopping to think things through sometimes and, in those moments, the choices that I made inevitably did not turn out the best for everyone involved.

Thankfully, I have made some major decisions in my life based on what was in everyone’s best interest.  And, in those instances, the results were positive.

• When my Mom died, I was 16 years old.  I sat at her grave-site and said to myself, “Sandy…this can either make you better or it can make you bitter.  It’s your choice.”  I chose to be better because of it…to be empathetic towards others who experience loss; to appreciate my health; and to strive to be like her ~ kind, strong, accepting, nonjudgmental.  That was the best choice for everyone because I still had a younger brother and Daddy to take care of at home and it would not have served them well for me to be bitter.

•  When my Daddy died unexpectedly on Christmas Eve, three years after my Mom, I had another choice to make.  I could be sad every year at Christmas time or I could celebrate it fully to make fond memories for others, that will last long after I am gone.  I was a teenager.  Did I really want Christmas to be a sad occasion for the rest of my life?  Absolutely not!  I chose to make it a joyous occasion and started collecting Christmas decorations and ornaments, obtaining something new every year since.  It takes me days to decorate my home for Christmas now and I love sharing it with others and hosting parties and celebrating Life!

•  Shortly after my Daddy died, I got married and, after a custody battle, his 5 year old daughter, Stephanie, came to live with us full-time.  Her Mother, Carolyn, moved away and was heartbroken.  Stephanie looked at me with her big, blue eyes and said “Do I call you Mommy now?”  I had a choice to make.  I could have told her to absolutely call me Mommy because I was her Mother now and could have spoken badly about her Mom.  Instead, I said “You have a Mommy that loves you very much.  You can call me Sandy.”  And…I chose to include Carolyn in every major decision and we stayed in close contact.  Now…30 years later, Carolyn and I are very close friends who (along with her Dad) raised a daughter together who is sweet, thoughtful, and kind.  Stephanie had the joy of always having three families that loved her and, even though her Dad and I divorced when she was 12, we are all a close, extended family to this day.

•  Even though I am not in a relationship with my 3 year old son’s father any more, we have chosen to be good friends and co-parents.  We truly care about each other and it is definitely in Jake’s best interest to see us respect each other and to be happy when we are around one another.

The next time that you have a major event in your life, won’t you take a moment to really think it through, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest?  Take it from me…it will make your life peaceful and happy & you will be setting a good example for those that look to you for guidance.

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I awoke on this first day of Spring to a choir of birds chirping  just outside of my home office.  When I walked outside to catch a glimpse of this talented ensemble, I was thrilled to see sprigs of green protruding from the branches of the bougainvillea that has long been brown and brittle.  At that moment…I took a deep breathe and swear that the air smelled sweeter than it ever has.  Then, my coffee tasted more savory; the sun shone brighter; and I started humming “I Can See Clearly Now”!!!
 
Ahhhh….Spring has Sprung!!!!  And…just like the new greenery on my bougainvillea (which I know is going to burst into bright red blooms soon), we have a chance to start anew!  Have you made some mistakes and/or bad decisions that have caused your life to feel brown and brittle?  Have you fallen into some bad habits that have caused you to lose the spring in your step?  I know that I have and I also know that it is time to do some “spring cleaning” so I can spring forward with a song in my heart. 
 
I am donning my Gratitude Gloves; grabbing my Blessing Broom; filling up my Positive Pail with Steadfast Soap and beginning anew with my 12 rules to live by…won’t you join me?
 
1.  Count your blessings daily.
 
2.  Be kind to everyone and do not judge.
 
3.  Forgive quickly (including yourself) and move on.
 
4.  It is easier to keep up than it is to catch up.
 
5.  Have a place for everything and keep everything in it’s place.
 
6.  Say “I love you” often.
 
7.  You are who you hang around.
 
8.  Take Responsibility for your actions.
 
9.  Don’t react to a stressful situation or sudden challenge…take a deep breathe and think it through first.
 
10.  Don’t stay in a relationship that’s not right (business or personal)  just because you do not want to hurt anyone’s feelings or appear confrontational.
 
11.  If you fail or experience a setback or bad day, pick yourself up and start over again.
 
12.  Laugh.  Often.
 
♫ It’s gonna be a bright, bright sun-shiny day!!!! ♫ 
 
 Sing it with me:   A bright, bright sun-shiny day
 
(image of flowers found at www.free-images.org.uk)
 

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When my three year old son, Jake, and I go for a walk or to the grocery store or anywhere for that matter, he acts as if he is running for Mayor.  He greets everyone with a cheerful “Hi” and  if he is not able to find out your name, he will make one up for you (and he always comes up with very interesting monikers for people)!

There was a time whenever my friends were worried that there was something wrong with him because he did not seem to connect.  He did not say the word “Mommy” until much, much later than his playmates.  In fact, he was the last one in our playgroup to roll over, sit up, crawl, walk, and talk although he is one of the eldest of the bunch.

I recently took him for his 3 year old check-up although he is 3.5 now.  I know, I know…I’m always late too (hey…wait a minute, maybe he comes by it justly?  And…before you judge my mothering skills, you must know that there were no major shots or anything involved in this doctor visit).  His Pediatrician was amazed at his level of communication (even though she had been somewhat skeptical that there was anything wrong when I showed up at her office in tears, one year earlier).  “Did you put him in therapy?” she asked.  “No” I replied “About a week after my panicked visit, he started talking up a storm, in complete sentences and full of emotion & empathy, and he has not stopped since!”  She and I hugged!

I looked at her, contemplatively, and said, “You know…there is a life lesson here.  We are sometimes so quick to judge and we, so often, live our lives in a state of comparison.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we simply accepted each other, encouraged each other to reach our potential, and did not judge each other’s process of growth, whether we be children or adults?”  She smiled and said “Why yes, it would”.  After she walked out with her stethoscope in hand, I gave my child an extra hug and gave myself a break for the fact that I was at a place that some may view as “being behind”.  And, as I walked out of the doctor’s office, I thought “Watch out world…I might just run for Mayor!”

*I am adding to this post to clarify a couple of things about my child.  He reached all of his major milestones within the “normal” time frames, it was just always at the very end.  He loves to play with other children and connects with people very well.  Like all 3 year olds, he asks millions of questions each day (his favorite is asking what every single sign says as we drive up and down Interstate 4; which we do a lot, so Mommy is learning the art of extreme patience) and we carry on conversations with each other.  He is smart and sweet with a great sense of humor and some of the same “quirks” that I had as a child.  I really believe that, while you should make sure that your child is developing his/her major milestones according to “the charts”, you also have to be careful about comparing him/her to other children.  And, I believe that you need to accept them for who they are and praise & encourage them to excel without placing judgment upon them.*

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Since I made the decision to start paying more attention to my blog, I perused the subjects that I had created when I set it up and came across “The Singlehood Journey” as a  choice.  It did not have any entries in it and I decided to quickly delete it as an option for me to write about!  Sure…I have lots of funny stories about being single (mostly from my pre-baby days of almost 4 years ago since I don’t go out much now) and I can certainly give a real view on that status (since I’ve spent more of my adult years “single” than I have “in a relationship”), but…I started thinking about how I am coaching people on how they need to “put out into The Universe” what they want to come back to them and decided that labeling myself as “single” and then writing about it consistently is not such a good idea after all!

I am certainly not “pining away” for a man nor do I ever feel lonely or sad (because I really do enjoy my own company).  However, when I think of the “big picture” of my life, I would like to finally meet and connect with the perfect man for me (and for my son).  I even sat down and wrote out my “man list” on a legal pad recently, which is something that I have never done.  It was actually kinda fun…well, it will be when I meet that guy!!!

So…the point of this blog post is…

Make sure that everything that you do and say is in alignment with the life that you wish to create for yourself while expressing Gratitude for what you currently have (I am actually very grateful that I am able to spend my time alone as I please right now) and watch your life transform according to your wishes.

Just think of the great love story that is going to appear in my life when the time is right!  It sure is gonna be fun!!

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I am well aware that, once you start blogging, the best thing you can do is to post on a regular basis.  Well…it has been over a month since I posted a blog article and so I wrote this little song (to the tune of “A Hunting We Will Go”) to express my feelings and get back into the groove…

A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go, 
Heigh ho, I’m behind – Oh No…a blogging I must go!
A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
I’ll write a note and include a cool quote
And then watch me go!

A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
Heigh ho, I’m behind – Oh No…a blogging I must go!
A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
I’ll think of thoughts that will repel the Spambots,
And then watch me go!

A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
Heigh ho, I’m behind – Oh No…a blogging I must go!
A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
I’ll throw in a bribe, so people will subscribe,
And then watch me go!

A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
Heigh ho, I’m behind – Oh No…a blogging I must go!
A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
I’ll get on a plan and become a Wordpress fan,
And then watch me go!

A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
Heigh ho, I’m behind – Oh No…a blogging I must go!
A blogging I must go, a blogging I must go,
I’ll have fun when The BOBs I have won,
And then watch me go!

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Today, on my 50th birthday, I would like to share 50 Life Lessons that I have learned.  Some of them are repeats of classics that are too powerful to re-word; some I have learned the hard way; some I am just now starting to implement; and some are humorous and meant to show that you should have fun in life!   Each one carries a valuable message so I hope you will savor them as you read…

My 50 Life Lessons

1.     Be true to yourself and follow your hearts desires.

 2.     Surround yourself with positive, supportive, and uplifting people.

 3.     Take responsibility for your actions and own up to your mistakes. 

 4.     Make decisions wisely and from a place of love and goodness, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest.

 5.     It’s okay to eat popcorn for dinner and sushi for breakfast.

 6.     Stand up for yourself and know that sometimes that simply means to move on, once you have done what is right.

 7.     Some people only come into your life for a season, and that’s okay.

 8.     Become an expert about something you’re passionate about.

 9.     Be honest.  Always.

 10.   Resolve issues quickly and with a calmness of spirit.

 11.     Give thanks all day long for all of your blessings, big and small.

 12.    Forgive others and yourself quickly…and move on.

 13.    Get on the floor and play with a child.

 14.    Establish traditions and keep them going.

 15.    Get 8 hours of sleep and drink lots of water.

 16.    Sit down with your parents and/or grandparents and have them share their life story.

 17.    Get married only if you have no doubts.

 18.    True friends are more valuable than gold.  Treasure them.

 19.    Never be judgmental and remember that what people think of you is none of your business.

 20.  There is no such thing as skirts that are too short, earrings that are too big, lipstick that is too bright, or heels that are too high when you’re going out!

 21.    Remove all negative influences from your life, including people who are toxic.

 22.   Be yourself, but be your best self.

 23.   Laugh.  A lot.

 24.  Travel to at least one foreign country.

 25.  Have a place for everything and everything in its place.

 26.  Always be the bigger person.

 27.  Reach out to help those less fortunate.

 28.  If you can’t say something nice about someone, then don’t say anything at all.

 29.  You are who you hang around.

 30.  Pursue your passions.

 31.   Keep a journal, especially a gratitude journal.

 32.  Write down your goals and take at least one action step toward them each day.

 33.  Be comfortable spending time with yourself.

 34.  Sing and Dance.  A lot.

 35.  Life is too short and too precious to hold grudges or to be jealous or envious.

 36.  Say “I love you”.  Often.

 37.  The minute you start to feel overwhelmed or stressed, take some deep breathes and count your blessings.

 38.   Eat Healthy.  Most of the time.

 39.   Do unto others as you would have done unto you.

 40.   Get massages.  A lot.

 41.    Regret is a wasted emotion.  Learn your lessons and move on.

 42.   Marry or date someone who loves to kiss.  A lot.

 43.   Be in the present moment.  You will never have that time again. 

 44.   Go to major events like someone’s wedding, graduation, funeral, or birthday party.  Once it is over, it’s over and you’ll never have a 2ndchance to attend.

 45.   Read.  A lot.

 46.   Take lots of pictures and arrange or organize them as soon as possible.

47.  Go ahead and ask for what you want.  If the answer is no, you have not lost anything.

 48.   If someone writes you a love letter, keep it forever.

 49.   It is easier to keep up than to catch up.

50.  You can’t change anyone.  Think of how hard it is to change yourself.

 And…One to grow on:  Always Be on Time!

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I had to write my annual poem
   As 2009 comes to an end
I am full of love and gratitude
   That to all of you I had to send.

Jake is now three years old
   He is friendly and such a little man
He is very tall with a head full of curls
   He speaks Spanish, sings songs, and is Mommy’s biggest fan.

Stephanie is a full-time student now
   And I can’t believe that Hailey has turned ten
I lost both Shakespeare and Spencer
   I sure miss my sweet, furry friends.

My family is happy and healthy
   A great-nephew named Luke Ryan arrived
I’m available to consult about real estate
   I still eat Mila each day to feel healthy and alive.

I created Gratitude Boot Camp
   Where I coach about counting your blessings
There is a Gratitude Boot Camp fan page on Facebook
   I can’t wait to see what miracles GBC brings.

I’m the Leader in Orlando and Celebration
   For a wonderful organization
Women’s Prosperity Network
   Is expanding throughout the Nation.

I’ve created a mantra for the New Year
   Let’s all say it together
Stand tall, Smile, and Shout Out Loud
   “2010 is my best year EVER”!

           HAPPY NEW YEAR!!

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