I was having dinner with a friend and we laughed over his latest adventure. Of course, we were able to laugh about it because he had the wisdom and strength not to immediately react to a situation, that could have proven deadly.
He was in a cage with a 500 lb female tiger that he had recently started to sponsor. Her trainer was in there and told him to remain calm whenever he could see that she was becoming extremely territorial with her “new toy”! As she placed her enormous arm around his body and took his arm into her mouth, his first instinct was to yank it away and run for his life. Just pulling back a little, caused her to clamp down her teeth and give him a constant reminder of the importance of being slow to react. He now sports two small scars on his arm. It could have been so much worse.
Though most of us will have few, if any, life-or-death situations; we will all experience circumstances that cause our heart to race and make us want to react immediately. Perhaps someone just sent you a nasty or threatening email. Perhaps you just found out that someone is spreading gossip. Perhaps you lost a business contract even though you did all the work. Reacting immediately to these types of events is actually the worst response. While it may not kill us, it could potentially tarnish our reputation; cause us to say things that we later regret; or end a relationship that could have been salvaged.
Unless your house is on fire or your child is about to dart into traffic, there are very few times when you must react immediately. When you experience an upsetting or unsettling occurrence, always stop before you do anything. Take some deep breathes. Count your blessings. Stretch. Go for a walk. Listen to some music. When you are in a more calm state of mind, sit down with a pen and paper & ask yourself these questions…
1. Why am I upset?
2. What is the most professional/spiritual way to handle this?
3. What steps do I need to take to address this so that it does not escalate or happen again? Would it be best to just ignore it so as not to antagonize?
4. Do I need to sever ties with this person? If so, how do I do that and remain “on the high road”?
5. Do I need to seek help from someone trustworthy and qualified?
6. What is the lesson for me to learn?
7. What is the humor in this?
The next time you find yourself feeling like a toy in the jaws of one of life’s ‘tigers’, simply STOP before acting. That way, the scars that you get, if any, will be small and you will feel as proud as a lion.
(Photo by Arvind Balaraman ~ http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=1058)
