Sandy Speaks…

I was having dinner with a friend and we laughed over his latest adventure.  Of course, we were able to laugh about it because he had the wisdom and strength not to immediately react to a situation, that could have proven deadly. 

He was in a cage with a 500 lb female tiger that he had recently started to sponsor.  Her trainer was in there and told him to remain calm whenever he could see that she was becoming extremely territorial with her “new toy”!  As she placed her enormous arm around his body and took his arm into her mouth, his first instinct was to yank it away and run for his life.  Just pulling back a little, caused her to clamp down her teeth and give him a constant reminder of the importance of being slow to react.  He now sports two small scars on his arm.  It could have been so much worse.

Though most of us will have few, if any, life-or-death situations; we will all experience circumstances that cause our heart to race and make us want to react immediately.  Perhaps someone just sent you a nasty or threatening email.  Perhaps you just found out that someone is spreading gossip.  Perhaps you lost a business contract even though you did all the work.   Reacting immediately to these types of events is actually the worst response.  While it may not kill us, it could potentially tarnish our reputation; cause us to say things that we later regret; or end a relationship that could have been salvaged.

Unless your house is on fire or your child is about to dart into traffic, there are very few times when you must react immediately.  When you experience an upsetting or unsettling occurrence, always stop before you do anything.  Take some deep breathes.  Count your blessings.  Stretch.  Go for a walk.  Listen to some music.  When you are in a more calm state of mind, sit down with a pen and paper & ask yourself these questions…

1.  Why am I upset?

2.  What is the most professional/spiritual way to handle this?

3.  What steps do I need to take to address this so that it does not escalate or happen again?  Would it be best to just ignore it so as not to antagonize?

4.  Do I need to sever ties with this person?  If so, how do I do that and remain “on the high road”?

5.  Do I need to seek help from someone trustworthy and qualified?

6.  What is the lesson for me to learn?

7.  What is the humor in this?

The next time you find yourself feeling like a toy in the jaws of one of life’s ‘tigers’, simply STOP before acting.  That way, the scars that you get, if any, will be small and you will feel as proud as a lion.

(Photo by Arvind Balaraman ~ http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=1058)

I was out of town Tuesday night when I received the text from my room-mate/manny, just before midnight.  He was contacting me with the news that my air conditioner had died…completely.  We live in Central Florida, where we have been experiencing temperatures in the 90’s, and even in the low 100’s some days!

My immediate reaction was an expletive spoken under my breath (which I quickly asked forgiveness for).  But, then I started “practicing what I preach” in my Gratitude Boot Camp sessions.  I took some deep, cleansing breaths and started counting all of my blessings.  Then, I said my prayers and drifted off to sleep soundly (instead of tossing and turning and worrying, as I would have done in days past).

The next day, I did not allow myself to get upset at all about the broken air conditioner, even though it was happening at an inopportune time.  Instead, I focused on my blessings; remembered that I grew up in a house with no air in Florida and survived; and took action to find ways to live with the situation for a while, by getting my hands on some oscillating fans to use temporarily.  I went about my day in a calm way, knowing that “this too shall pass”.

As I was driving home last night, I kept my thoughts on all of the good things going on in my life, not allowing any negative statements to enter my brain, not even for a minute!  When we arrived home, I explained to my almost-four year old son, Jake, that he was only gonna sleep in a light shirt, instead of his jammies and socks, for a while.  I started walking towards the stairs to put him to bed.  I felt completely at ease with our situation and was ready to let the hot night take me back to happy, childhood memories.  

As I was passing by the closet that holds the breaker box for my house, I stopped to check it even though David had already done so.  The breaker for the air conditioner appeared to be lined up with all of the rest, but I flipped it off and back on any way.  It was music to my ears when I heard the air conditioner kick on and Jake squealed with delight when his Mommy started doing a very up-beat happy dance!  We danced around and sang our new “Mommy and Jake are Grateful for Air Conditioning” song for quite a while before we went up to his bedroom.  It was fun!!!

I woke up feeling extra grateful and happy today.  David is perplexed.  Jake is well-rested.  And, I am feeling the powerful sense of accomplishment that comes with remaining calm during a crises.  

Resolve, right now, that you will remain calm the next time an unexpected challenge arises in your life.  It is powerful.

Every once in a while, Opportunity knocks and you know that not only do you need to open the door wide…you need to grab her, give her a welcoming hug, invite her to dinner and use your best china!

I was sitting at my desk at the end of March and, at the exact moment that I thought to myself,  ”I must get my book written NOW”, I received an email from a friend that invited Authors and Aspiring Authors to take part in “The Next Top Spiritual Author” competition.  Wow…another serendipitous moment that sent chill bumps all over my body!

Ever since I created Gratitude Boot Camp last year and started sharing it as a coaching program, I have been led to put it into book form so that millions can benefit from learning how to make gratitude a daily habit.  During the first Gratitude Boot Camp session I watched, in awe, as people’s lives were transformed, personally and professionally.  After speaking at a Law of Attraction Meetup, I was approached by a woman who told me that I had given her the strength to continue after losing her son 8 months before.  My story had inspired her to be grateful for the time that she had him and to focus on her current blessings.  That is when I decided to include some of my personal story, in my book, along with the steps needed to create a life filled with happiness, love, peace, success, and abundance.

The Next Top Author Competition started on March 29th.  It is comprised of four rounds where Authors share their books with a panel of publishing experts and with the public.  In the final round, the Grand Prize Winner will receive a publishing contract with Hampton Roads Publishing.  I am excited to present my upcoming book, Gratitude Habit, as an entry.  Please visit http://sn.im/TopAuthor to watch the video pitch of my book; read the book proposal and read Chapter 1.  While you are there, be sure and vote!

There were 2800 Authors who competed in Round 1 and 271 advanced to Round 2.  I am so honored to be one of them and am grateful for everyone’s support.  I finished uploading my book proposal and Chapter 1 last night, just as the Season Finale’ of American Idol was ending.  I thought to myself “How exciting!  I feel like I am involved in ‘The American Idol for Authors’!!

Welcome Home, Opportunity!  I’ve been waiting for you my entire life!!

Begin and end your day with these affirmations. 

Take some deep breaths and get into a relaxed state and, as you read each one, feel the emotion that it invokes.

Do this daily…your words create your reality…

♥ I am filled with Gratitude for all of my blessings today!

♥ I have great self-management skills!

♥ I am surrounded by positive people who add value to my life!

♥ I am massively organized!

♥ I have a joyful spirit!

♥ I am financially free and am Grateful for my riches!

♥ Today, I will concentrate on taking one step forward, however small!

♥ I do whatever it takes!

♥ I act in spite of my fears!

♥ My loved ones are happy, healthy, and prospering!

♥ I schedule my priorities every day!

♥ I am laser-focused on my priorities!

♥ I am a self-reliant and successful person!

♥ I forgive quickly and move on!

♥ I resolve issues quickly and with a calmness of spirit!

♥ I live a healthy lifestyle!

♥ I learn from every experience!

♥ I eliminate all negativity out of my life!

♥ My thoughts are creative and I am now creating the reality that I desire!

♥ I will take at least 1 action today in the direction of my long term plans!

♥ I am always receiving money making ideas and acting upon them!

♥ I only attract loving people in my world for they are a mirror of what I am!

♥ Today, I choose to find the good in myself and others!

♥ I see past old limitations and envision new opportunities!

♥ I love myself. And I love how I feel when I love myself!

♥ I am an extreme action taker!

♥ I am more enthusiastic today and am improving this trait daily!

♥ I am prosperous and abundant. I gain income from unexpected sources!

♥ Divine love is working through me now!

♥ I add value to other people’s lives!

♥ I let go of any burdens that are not mine to carry!

♥ I give generously and from my heart!

♥ I am decisive and follow through!

♥ I am positive and optimistic!

♥ I commit to being rich in every way!

♥ I now have more money that I need!

♥ I always awaken completely refreshed!

♥ Today, I am energetic and enthusiastic!

♥ I live with purpose and passion!

♥ I have compassion for all living things!

♥ I release judgment and criticism of myself and others!

♥ Every breath I take brings me greater health and vitality!

♥ I love my life!

♥ Money is flowing into my life, quickly and easily!

♥ I am grateful for today and for all of my blessings!

I am spending this weekend literally getting my house in order!

As I look around at the toys strewn near & far; at the pile of clean laundry that needs to be folded (that is so tall my 3 year old son has been pretending that it is a mound of snow); at the weeds inching their way higher & higher through the brick pavers in my courtyard…I start to feel overwhelmed.  Tears are filling my eyes as I am writing this blog post.

First of all, I am not used to my house getting so out of control and am wondering how in the world I let this happen.  Secondly, it is not my style to let people know that things are a mess.  After all, I am the gal who holds it all together…running my businesses; maintaining my friendships; being a full-time, single Mommy; acting as head of the household…and never stops smiling!!

But, today…I am confessing that things are a complete mess!  So, what do I do?

Well, the first thing I’m doing (after this admission) is “blessing my mess”!  That’s right!  I am expressing gratitude that I have a home to clean; that I have a child to scatter toys everywhere; that I have friendships to maintain & businesses to run. 

Then, I am “grabbing the bull by the horns”!  I am ‘cranking up’ my stereo and inviting  Madonna, Abba, Michael Jackson, and Bon Jovi into my messy house…to fill me with energy and make the task enjoyable!  I will take it one room at a time and will not stop until my house is back in order!

Sometimes our lives become a big mess, don’t they?  When that happens…bless your mess, grab the bull by the horns, take it one step at a time, enjoy the journey, and don’t stop until your life is back in order!

And, then…reward yourself!!  Any suggestions on what I should do when my house is back in order?

(picture taken from www.bigfoto.com)

Every once in a while, Opportunity knocks and you know that not only do you need to open the door wide…you need to grab her, give her a welcoming hug, invite her to dinner and use your best china!

I was sitting at my desk a few nights ago and, at the exact moment that I thought to myself,  ”I must get my book written NOW”, I received an email from a friend that invited Authors and Aspiring Authors to take part in “The Next Top Spiritual Author” competition.  Wow…another serendipitous moment that sent chill bumps all over my body!

Ever since I created “Gratitude Boot Camp” last year and started sharing it as a coaching program, I have been led to put it into book form so that millions can benefit from learning how to make gratitude a daily habit.  During the first Gratitude Boot Camp session I watched, in awe, as people’s lives were transformed, personally and professionally.  And, after speaking at a Law of Attraction Meetup, I was approached by a woman who told me that I had given her the strength to continue after losing her son 8 months before.  My story had inspired her to be grateful for the time that she had him and to focus on her current blessings.  That is when I decided to include my personal story, in my book, along with the steps needed to create a life filled with happiness, love, peace, success, and abundance.

The Next Top Author Competition started on March 29th.  It is comprised of four rounds where Authors will pitch their book idea; prepare a book proposal; and submit chapters.  In the final round, the Grand Prize Winner will receive a publishing contract with Hampton Roads Publishing.  I am honored to present my upcoming book, Gratitude Habit, as an entry.  You can read more about Gratitude Habit at http://www.SandySpeaks.com/books and can hear the audio pitch on my Next Top Author profile page.

There are over 2500 Authors competing in Round 1.  Only 250 will advance to Round 2 and 75% of the vote is based on the number of votes that an Author obtains.  Please help me spread the Power of Gratitude to millions by voting for me on my Next Top Author profile page at http://www.sn.im/TopAuthor.  

After you vote, send me an e-mail message at Sandy@GratitudeBootCamp.com and I will send you the article that I wrote entitled “6 Simple Ways to Create The Gratitude Habit”.  Additonally, everyone who votes will be placed in a drawing to receive free tuition to a 12-week Gratitude Boot Camp TeleClass and an autographed copy of Gratitude Habit.

Welcome Home, Opportunity!  I’ve been waiting for you my entire life!!!

When I posted my 50 life lessons in January, number four on the list was…

Make decisions wisely and from a place of love and goodness, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest.

Oftentimes in life, we either make hasty decisions (which is never wise) or we make decisions based totally on our own selfish desires.  I have certainly been guilty of not stopping to think things through sometimes and, in those moments, the choices that I made inevitably did not turn out the best for everyone involved.

Thankfully, I have made some major decisions in my life based on what was in everyone’s best interest.  And, in those instances, the results were positive.

• When my Mom died, I was 16 years old.  I sat at her grave-site and said to myself, “Sandy…this can either make you better or it can make you bitter.  It’s your choice.”  I chose to be better because of it…to be empathetic towards others who experience loss; to appreciate my health; and to strive to be like her ~ kind, strong, accepting, nonjudgmental.  That was the best choice for everyone because I still had a younger brother and Daddy to take care of at home and it would not have served them well for me to be bitter.

•  When my Daddy died unexpectedly on Christmas Eve, three years after my Mom, I had another choice to make.  I could be sad every year at Christmas time or I could celebrate it fully to make fond memories for others, that will last long after I am gone.  I was a teenager.  Did I really want Christmas to be a sad occasion for the rest of my life?  Absolutely not!  I chose to make it a joyous occasion and started collecting Christmas decorations and ornaments, obtaining something new every year since.  It takes me days to decorate my home for Christmas now and I love sharing it with others and hosting parties and celebrating Life!

•  Shortly after my Daddy died, I got married and, after a custody battle, his 5 year old daughter, Stephanie, came to live with us full-time.  Her Mother, Carolyn, moved away and was heartbroken.  Stephanie looked at me with her big, blue eyes and said “Do I call you Mommy now?”  I had a choice to make.  I could have told her to absolutely call me Mommy because I was her Mother now and could have spoken badly about her Mom.  Instead, I said “You have a Mommy that loves you very much.  You can call me Sandy.”  And…I chose to include Carolyn in every major decision and we stayed in close contact.  Now…30 years later, Carolyn and I are very close friends who (along with her Dad) raised a daughter together who is sweet, thoughtful, and kind.  Stephanie had the joy of always having three families that loved her and, even though her Dad and I divorced when she was 12, we are all a close, extended family to this day.

•  Even though I am not in a relationship with my 3 year old son’s father any more, we have chosen to be good friends and co-parents.  We truly care about each other and it is definitely in Jake’s best interest to see us respect each other and to be happy when we are around one another.

The next time that you have a major event in your life, won’t you take a moment to really think it through, choosing to do what is in everyone’s best interest?  Take it from me…it will make your life peaceful and happy & you will be setting a good example for those that look to you for guidance.

Celebration and Google…now that sounds like a powerful combination!!  Google began as a research project by Larry Page and Sergey Brin and their new technology quickly changed the face of the Internet.  Celebration began as a dream of Walt Disney’s…a place where people could live, work, & play…and quickly changed the face of communities everywhere!

From now until March 26th, Google is asking for communities to be nominated for their high fiber project.  I hereby nominate my community…Celebration, Florida!  In my opinion, Celebration would be a prime location for Google to test their network.  Just like the founders of Google, the developers and residents of Celebration pride themselves on being on the cutting edge!  Our community is founded on five cornerstones…education, health, community, architecture, and technology. 

Like me, many residents work from home and would utilize and appreciate having this advanced technology. And, because many of us are active and vocal in social media and other avenues of communication, we would be a great group to help “get the word out” to our associates, friends, fans, followers, and tweeps!

It would also be cost-effective for Google since fiiber has been installed in many of the neighborhoods here (with only the last 30 feet to the house remaining) and since we are a high-density community.

I have lived in Celebration for 10 years and enjoy it’s charm and beauty. I am looking forward to raising my 3 year old son here and can only imagine what advances await him in education.  As a parent, I feel that it is important that I do what I can to support his future and am, therefore, asking for Google’s consideration of Celebration for this exciting experiment. 

When my three year old son, Jake, and I go for a walk or to the grocery store or anywhere for that matter, he acts as if he is running for Mayor.  He greets everyone with a cheerful “Hi” and  if he is not able to find out your name, he will make one up for you (and he always comes up with very interesting monikers for people)!

There was a time whenever my friends were worried that there was something wrong with him because he did not seem to connect.  He did not say the word “Mommy” until much, much later than his playmates.  In fact, he was the last one in our playgroup to roll over, sit up, crawl, walk, and talk although he is one of the eldest of the bunch.

I recently took him for his 3 year old check-up although he is 3.5 now.  I know, I know…I’m always late too (hey…wait a minute, maybe he comes by it justly?  And…before you judge my mothering skills, you must know that there were no major shots or anything involved in this doctor visit).  His Pediatrician was amazed at his level of communication (even though she had been somewhat skeptical that there was anything wrong when I showed up at her office in tears, one year earlier).  “Did you put him in therapy?” she asked.  “No” I replied “About a week after my panicked visit, he started talking up a storm, in complete sentences and full of emotion & empathy, and he has not stopped since!”  She and I hugged!

I looked at her, contemplatively, and said, “You know…there is a life lesson here.  We are sometimes so quick to judge and we, so often, live our lives in a state of comparison.  Wouldn’t it be nice if we simply accepted each other, encouraged each other to reach our potential, and did not judge each other’s process of growth, whether we be children or adults?”  She smiled and said “Why yes, it would”.  After she walked out with her stethoscope in hand, I gave my child an extra hug and gave myself a break for the fact that I was at a place that some may view as “being behind”.  And, as I walked out of the doctor’s office, I thought “Watch out world…I might just run for Mayor!”

*I am adding to this post to clarify a couple of things about my child.  He reached all of his major milestones within the “normal” time frames, it was just always at the very end.  He loves to play with other children and connects with people very well.  Like all 3 year olds, he asks millions of questions each day (his favorite is asking what every single sign says as we drive up and down Interstate 4; which we do a lot, so Mommy is learning the art of extreme patience) and we carry on conversations with each other.  He is smart and sweet with a great sense of humor and some of the same “quirks” that I had as a child.  I really believe that, while you should make sure that your child is developing his/her major milestones according to “the charts”, you also have to be careful about comparing him/her to other children.  And, I believe that you need to accept them for who they are and praise & encourage them to excel without placing judgment upon them.*