Sandy Speaks…

I was having dinner with a friend and we laughed over his latest adventure.  Of course, we were able to laugh about it because he had the wisdom and strength not to immediately react to a situation, that could have proven deadly. 

He was in a cage with a 500 lb female tiger that he had recently started to sponsor.  Her trainer was in there and told him to remain calm whenever he could see that she was becoming extremely territorial with her “new toy”!  As she placed her enormous arm around his body and took his arm into her mouth, his first instinct was to yank it away and run for his life.  Just pulling back a little, caused her to clamp down her teeth and give him a constant reminder of the importance of being slow to react.  He now sports two small scars on his arm.  It could have been so much worse.

Though most of us will have few, if any, life-or-death situations; we will all experience circumstances that cause our heart to race and make us want to react immediately.  Perhaps someone just sent you a nasty or threatening email.  Perhaps you just found out that someone is spreading gossip.  Perhaps you lost a business contract even though you did all the work.   Reacting immediately to these types of events is actually the worst response.  While it may not kill us, it could potentially tarnish our reputation; cause us to say things that we later regret; or end a relationship that could have been salvaged.

Unless your house is on fire or your child is about to dart into traffic, there are very few times when you must react immediately.  When you experience an upsetting or unsettling occurrence, always stop before you do anything.  Take some deep breathes.  Count your blessings.  Stretch.  Go for a walk.  Listen to some music.  When you are in a more calm state of mind, sit down with a pen and paper & ask yourself these questions…

1.  Why am I upset?

2.  What is the most professional/spiritual way to handle this?

3.  What steps do I need to take to address this so that it does not escalate or happen again?  Would it be best to just ignore it so as not to antagonize?

4.  Do I need to sever ties with this person?  If so, how do I do that and remain “on the high road”?

5.  Do I need to seek help from someone trustworthy and qualified?

6.  What is the lesson for me to learn?

7.  What is the humor in this?

The next time you find yourself feeling like a toy in the jaws of one of life’s ‘tigers’, simply STOP before acting.  That way, the scars that you get, if any, will be small and you will feel as proud as a lion.

(Photo by Arvind Balaraman ~ http://www.freedigitalphotos.net/images/view_photog.php?photogid=1058)

It has been my life-long dream to be a writer and a speaker.  When I was a little girl, I would write stories and read them to my parents, who always gave me raving reviews!  In the summer of 2009, I made the decision to finally fulfill that dream.  

In March of this year, I entered a competition, along with 2800 other Authors, called “The Next Top Spiritual Author” with my first solo book, “Gratitude Habit”.  In May, I advanced to Round 2, along with 270 other Authors.  During a conference call yesterday, the 25 Authors who are advancing into Round 3 were announced.  I am grateful & honored to be one of them!

The night before the call, I could not sleep at all as I was filled with anticipation.  The morning of the call, I was invited to visit a page on Facebook where several participants were sharing their feelings.  Everyone was feeling nervous and excited about the announcement.  When they called my name, I instantly started crying and fell to my knees to give thanks to God.  Then, I started thinking “Did they really just call my name?”  I was almost scared to believe it!  It wasn’t until someone posted “congratulations” on my Facebook wall that it started to sink in that I actually had advanced!!

After the call, I told my three year old son, Jake, that it was time to do a happy dance, which we reserve for really big celebrations!  We danced and jumped and sang until I was out of breathe!  We then placed a few phone calls to share the news with our closest friends and Jake caught on that they were saying “congratulations”.  Later that day, he said “Congratunations, Mommy!”  It was so sweet and adorable!!!!

In the first two rounds, part of our score was based on obtaining votes from the public and I am so grateful to all of my supporters.  In this round, there will be no public voting.  Each of the 25 Authors will submit two more chapters of our book, which will be reviewed by a panel of publishing professionals.  The panel will choose the four finalists for round four of the competition.  Every Author who entered this contest deserves applause.  I am looking forward to reading each book that comes to fruition because of this spiritual movement.

As I continue forth on my mission to spread the power of gratitude, my biggest wish is that my parents were still alive to see me working on making my dream come true.  I know that they would be my biggest fans!!

I was out of town Tuesday night when I received the text from my room-mate/manny, just before midnight.  He was contacting me with the news that my air conditioner had died…completely.  We live in Central Florida, where we have been experiencing temperatures in the 90’s, and even in the low 100’s some days!

My immediate reaction was an expletive spoken under my breath (which I quickly asked forgiveness for).  But, then I started “practicing what I preach” in my Gratitude Boot Camp sessions.  I took some deep, cleansing breaths and started counting all of my blessings.  Then, I said my prayers and drifted off to sleep soundly (instead of tossing and turning and worrying, as I would have done in days past).

The next day, I did not allow myself to get upset at all about the broken air conditioner, even though it was happening at an inopportune time.  Instead, I focused on my blessings; remembered that I grew up in a house with no air in Florida and survived; and took action to find ways to live with the situation for a while, by getting my hands on some oscillating fans to use temporarily.  I went about my day in a calm way, knowing that “this too shall pass”.

As I was driving home last night, I kept my thoughts on all of the good things going on in my life, not allowing any negative statements to enter my brain, not even for a minute!  When we arrived home, I explained to my almost-four year old son, Jake, that he was only gonna sleep in a light shirt, instead of his jammies and socks, for a while.  I started walking towards the stairs to put him to bed.  I felt completely at ease with our situation and was ready to let the hot night take me back to happy, childhood memories.  

As I was passing by the closet that holds the breaker box for my house, I stopped to check it even though David had already done so.  The breaker for the air conditioner appeared to be lined up with all of the rest, but I flipped it off and back on any way.  It was music to my ears when I heard the air conditioner kick on and Jake squealed with delight when his Mommy started doing a very up-beat happy dance!  We danced around and sang our new “Mommy and Jake are Grateful for Air Conditioning” song for quite a while before we went up to his bedroom.  It was fun!!!

I woke up feeling extra grateful and happy today.  David is perplexed.  Jake is well-rested.  And, I am feeling the powerful sense of accomplishment that comes with remaining calm during a crises.  

Resolve, right now, that you will remain calm the next time an unexpected challenge arises in your life.  It is powerful.